Knock, knock…… anybody out there!!! No? Just me so! I’m still here, still keeping on and still busy as ever. I was trying to think of what I wanted to say and decided my life was very boring……. And then I thought again and realised it wasn’t!
The past few weeks have been busy prepping for my sister’s wedding. If being a bridesmaid for your sister doesn’t give you palpitations nothing will 😉 Like every girl I love a wedding, the build-up, the dresses all the excitement makes for a great day. Thankfully the week before the wedding I had two days off, which was nice and meant I was able to run around like a looney for a few days…… told you I was chilled!!! The wedding was fab, and of course the bride was a stunner (I know, I know, she is my sister after all I’d expect no less!!!!). It’s funny when I haven’t seen people for a long time and everyone is curious as to how I am and how I’m getting on with my recovery, but sometimes those questions are hard to answer. I was curious as to how much they wanted to know, if they were just being polite by asking so most of them got the general answer of ‘yeah, great thanks’ which isn’t a lie. I am doing great, but do they really want to get into the days that I get tired? The odd niggles I get after exercise (which are getting less and less) or the days when I’m stupid and just overdo it. How much do people want, or need to know? I don’t want to bore people with information, that’s what I have my blog for, so I can bore you guys instead!
Of course, its lovely that people are genuinely interested, and they care but I become more conscious of them and not wanting to give too much away. Anyhow the wedding was brilliant, and we danced (like Beyoncé obviously!!!) all night. The next morning, I questioned whether I had been hit by a bus, turned out I wasn’t, I had open heart surgery 5 months ago and forgot all about it! My Beyoncé dance moves were a good idea at the time, not so good the next day. Thankfully it didn’t last as long as it used to and I was fine again by lunch time. The pains at this stage are getting less and less and even weeks pass without any which is great. Sometimes I forget what’s happened, and sometimes everyone else does too but that has to happen sometime doesn’t it? No, I’ll never forget what happened, nor would I want to, but things move on, life goes by and we can’t dwell on it forever.
I don’t need to tell myself not to do ‘too much’ I’ll find out after I overdo it. Probably not the best plan but it’s been working so far. It did happen recently when I had a lot on my plate and needed to take some time off, but that has to be ok. I remember a lot of people telling me I looked unwell and tired, but I ignored it until I knew I couldn’t anymore. I took a day off college and had a day off work after it and relaxed for a day or two. That did the job, nothing endless cups of tea can’t solve. So, if you’re reading this going through the same thing then just remember something, its ok not to be ok. And no, not everyone will understand but that ok too. When you think there’s something not right then chances are…… there’s something not right. So, batten down the hatches, curl up under the duvet and shut the world out for a while. I remember my surgeon telling me about those days, shut the curtains and stay in bed was his advice, if it’s good enough for him then it’s good enough for us too!!Last week though I was having one of those evenings when I don’t fancy getting to the gym so I decided to try to go for a run. I started on the route that I used to walk when I first came home from hospital. Now, it’s a 5K route which, when I was walking post op I barely did half of and consisted of many breaks. This time I ran it….. the whole thing!! I did it, and survived which is always a bonus!
This evening though something so lovely happened to me that I had to get on and share. As I was leaving the gym I got stopped by a guy I have seen there a few times (no he wasn’t checking out my amazing…… earphones!!). He stopped me and shook my hand. He told me he wanted to tell me he admired what I was going through. I was baffled. Someone had told him what had happened and he had wanted to talk to me since then. As it happens this guy also had a problem with his heart. We chatted for a while, this guy was in the army and he was telling me he admired me?!?!?! It’s not often I’m stuck for words (in case you haven’t noticed!!!) but this guy got me. I hear it from Martin all the time how brave I was, but it goes straight over my head. This was new, and it was lovely. For someone to come to me and tell me their story made my day…… NEW HEART FRIEND<3
So, there it is, the latest update from my side. I’ll leave a picture of me and Martin from the wedding looking like two normal, glamorous people. I hope everyone is doing well and their days are going well, filled with good people, lots of smiles and getting there slowly but surely.
Keep on keeping on.